Valentine’s Day – Yay or Nay?

14 Feb

Are you in the I LOVE Valentine’s Day camp or the I REALLY Can’t Stand Valentine’s Day camp?

I’m somewhere in between.  I don’t hate the holiday, but it’s not a big deal to me, either.  If I get a card or a gift, nice.  If I don’t, no biggie, either.

This is such a reversal of attitude from my pre-marriage days.

Those years when I was single and not dating someone, Valentine’s Day just plain stunk.  If you are single and reading this, you know what I’m talking about.  Oh, how I wanted the flowers and the dinner and the gifts.  It seemed like – literally – every other living, breathing person in the world was excited about the holiday except for me.  It also seemed like every person I worked with was receiving flowers or balloons (even the men!), even though the reality of that is completely untrue.  Funny how the mind exaggerates things when we are feeling sorry for ourselves!

Anyway, fast forward to 2003.  My first Valentine’s Day as a married woman.  Suddenly, Valentine’s Day is not that big of a deal to me.  Why?  Because I no longer felt left out.  I had someone at home who loved me every day of the year, not just on Valentine’s Day.  My perspective changed.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I love me some Hallmark cards.  :)  The Hallmark Store and I have a close, personal relationship that goes way back and I have a worn out Hallmark Gold Crowne card to prove it!  ha ha!  But I like giving the cards more than getting them.  But I don’t want Barry to feel obligated to buy me a gift because he thinks he has to.  I don’t feel any more or less loved by my husband if he does or does give me something, do something, or take me somewhere for Valentine’s Day.  I feel loved every day by this wonderful man.

Source: Pinterest

[Is this vintage valentine adorable or what??]

However, having said all of this, I do think any holiday that causes us to stop for even a second to tell someone we love them – whether it be a spouse, child, parent, sibling or friend, is a good day.  So let me say this – I love you all.  Those of you I know and even those of you I don’t know or am just getting to know.  I love you for taking time out of your day to come read what I have to say.  I hope that every now and then you might get a tiny bit of encouragement out of it.  Or laughter.  Or both.  Encouragement AND laughter would be good  :)

Happy Heart Day!
♥ Rachel


10 Responses to “Valentine’s Day – Yay or Nay?”

  1. Simply Tia February 14, 2012 at 6:01 am #

    This is my first Valentine’s Day being married and it feels the same as when I was single or dating – another day. Never felt bad about it when I was single and never went crazy when I was involved. Valentines Schmalentine’s!

    • rachturner February 14, 2012 at 11:10 am #

      Hey Tia – Well, first of all, congrats on your marriage you newlywed!! I don’t know why it bothered me when I was single. Maybe I just didn’t like the feeling of being left out of something? Happy Schmalentine’s to you!

  2. Cancer Warrior February 14, 2012 at 9:04 am #

    Hi Rachel,

    I found your blog through a comment you made on mine, We are definitely kindred spirits. Finding Blessings in Disguise, is like my quest to find the perks of having cancer. I believe that we get to choose our attitude, and there is no doubt that you are choosing a positive one!
    I am starting a new feature on my blog, I am going to be doing a Guest Post each Wednedsay. Will you PLEASE write a guest post for me? You can email me at edpsychologist at to work out the details.
    Cancer Warrior (Florence)

    • rachturner February 14, 2012 at 11:11 am #

      Hey Flo – I just sent you an email. Thanks so much for the offer! I’d love to.

  3. Brenda McFarland February 14, 2012 at 3:52 pm #

    Hi Rachel, So I have to share this. Two of my classes this semester are high school students who attend an Early College program. So anyway …. today they come in and have all decided the new name for Valentine’s Day should be “Awkward Single’s Day” …. guess at 14 and 15, they are not all in love :-) Have you seen Valentine’s Day (the movie)? Worth a couple of bucks to rent … she dubs it anti-Valentines Day because she has no one special in her life. But what a shame … we all have so many special people in our lives and some of us just take them all for granted. Valentine’s are not reserved for people in love …. but to tell special people how much we love them! So Happy Valentine’s Day Rachel, I love ya!!

    • rachturner February 15, 2012 at 8:35 pm #

      Awkward Single’s Day! Too funny! You got it right, though, it’s not just about romantic love, but about expressing our love for all those in our lives who we care about. Hope you had a beautiful Valentine’s Day with your guys.

  4. Kathy February 14, 2012 at 10:05 pm #

    I agree with Brenda. I’ve never thought of Valentine’s Day as a day just for people in love. I remember how special it made me feel that Dad always got us girls big boxes of chocolate and of course Mom got the bigger one!

    I know a man who passes out a small box of chocolate to no telling how many women including me every single Valentine’s Day. He brightens a lot of women’s days with his gesture. He tells the guys they’re “not his type”!

    I treasure a Valentine’s gift I got from Phil in 2009. It was my beautiful Great Pyrenees, Harley. This year, I did the only thing I could do…I took a single red rose to the cemetery and placed it on Phil’s grave. Just after I got back home two of the sweetest little dogs came walking all the way down the half mile long driveway to our home. They were lost, cold, wet and one even had an injured leg. You know how every house on our street sits near the road except ours. We are, without a doubt the most difficult house for these small dogs to make it to…but they did, even with an injury! I first thought “Why me, Lord…I don’t have time for this right now” and then I realized that they were most likely guided to me as a Valentine’s Day “gift” from Phil. Now I feel thankful for a fantastic reminder of the way God gives us what we really need when we least expect it. Blessings in Disguise, wouldn’t you say!

    • rachturner February 15, 2012 at 8:40 pm #

      K – What a sweet man to give candy ! I remember those heart shaped boxes of chocolate from Dad. :) I read your email and cannot believe that two dogs found their way – all the way down that driveway – to your house on Valentine’s Day. Hmmm….. Very interesting. They are some sweet puppies – I sure hope you can find their home or find new homes for them. Yep, a Blessing in two furry disguises. :)

      • Kathy February 16, 2012 at 6:02 pm #

        Update – Happy to report that we were able to reunited the little “escape artists” with their family just a little while ago. I’m thankful that we were in the right place at the right time to help this have a good outcome.

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